Please join me as work to make sense of my life as a fire wife. This is his TRUE calling. He was a tremendous elementary school teacher, but this is definitely where he sees himself happy. This is my journey to acceptance and support for my husband's dream job come true. Real, sometimes raw and almost uncensored.
"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you. . . when you walk through the fire, you will not be burned. . .for I am the Lord your God"
Love this post, love your blog. I also have a couple private facebook pages where I can talk to other moms who parent medically fragile children. While others may try to and want to understand, there are some paths that you have to walk in order to be able to truly "get it." It is my sanity saver, too. {{HUGS}}
Wow. I have totally felt this way lately. It seems I'm having to filter myself in my haven more so because some people are "offended" with everything I have to say. Really makes me debate being in the only group who gets my life. Glad I'm not the only one. We can have filter free sessions together!!
UM YES!! When I came to the group, and started my blog, it was to vent, and so I knew I wasn't lone in the frustrations this life dishes out. Which unfortunately feels single a ton. I think it is normal and I think your filter is at just right!!! Love you sweetie! You can always chat with me@
I joined that group when it first started and probably by day two I was done in on account of comments like that.
It's simply ridiculous to live your life afraid that your husband might not come home because he's a firefighter.
Office Workers, Doctors, Walmart employees (etc) are subject to not return home from work either. How many people were killed in car accidents or work related accidents today? How many of them were firefighters?
Yet who gives Office Workers...probably not Doctors, though, they can afford maids...and Walmart workers (etc) a free pass from their home and family obligations because they might not return home that night?
And that's the rub. If they don't get killed, the Office workers and others (in general) return home each day, help with the kids and homework, and is in bed with you at night.
Fire wives spend 24-48 - 96 hours to months as a single parent. Handling everything, taking care of the kids and home and sleeping alone.
As most fire wives know, most anything that can go wrong will go wrong on shift day(s). Missed holidays and events, last-minute changed plans. Things that go bump in the night.
Our lives are pretty darn frustrating (and I don't even work a full time job like you do. I don't know how you manage!). But venting our frustrations about these things doesn't diminish his job, and if my FF didn't come home tomorrow I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be thinking "OH GOD, if only I hadn't asked him to vacuum the bedroom last night!"
FFW ISN'T the only private fire wives group, you know.
Oh yes, I totally understand!! I'm glad you didn't leave. :) I often have to remind my husband that even though he's home, the work doesn't end until the kids are asleep. THEN we can relax!! And I was going to say the same thing as Melissa, that the rest of us are probably just as likely to not return home one day. Between childbirth and driving so much, I think I may have him beat as far as risks taken!!
Thanks to all my gals. And this is why I stay with the groups. These are my people, they understand. And there is love to be felt. We made it through the insane week and now he is home for 10 days, which gives be a few moments to breath. Ahhhhhh.
Ladies, you are all amazing and I am so grateful to have you all "here" with me. Please know that you are indeed all appreciated.
I'm glad to be stuck with you. You have too many wise words not to be sharing them. Thank you!!
ReplyDeleteLove this post, love your blog. I also have a couple private facebook pages where I can talk to other moms who parent medically fragile children. While others may try to and want to understand, there are some paths that you have to walk in order to be able to truly "get it." It is my sanity saver, too. {{HUGS}}
ReplyDeleteWow. I have totally felt this way lately. It seems I'm having to filter myself in my haven more so because some people are "offended" with everything I have to say. Really makes me debate being in the only group who gets my life. Glad I'm not the only one. We can have filter free sessions together!!
ReplyDeleteUM YES!! When I came to the group, and started my blog, it was to vent, and so I knew I wasn't lone in the frustrations this life dishes out. Which unfortunately feels single a ton. I think it is normal and I think your filter is at just right!!! Love you sweetie! You can always chat with me@
ReplyDeleteUgh...I feel your pain about "the insanity of Fire Wife Life." So glad to have you as a sympathetic ear. You truly understand what I always feel too.
ReplyDeleteI joined that group when it first started and probably by day two I was done in on account of comments like that.
ReplyDeleteIt's simply ridiculous to live your life afraid that your husband might not come home because he's a firefighter.
Office Workers, Doctors, Walmart employees (etc) are subject to not return home from work either.
How many people were killed in car accidents or work related accidents today? How many of them were firefighters?
Yet who gives Office Workers...probably not Doctors, though, they can afford maids...and Walmart workers (etc) a free pass from their home and family obligations because they might not return home that night?
And that's the rub. If they don't get killed, the Office workers and others (in general) return home each day, help with the kids and homework, and is in bed with you at night.
Fire wives spend 24-48 - 96 hours to months as a single parent. Handling everything, taking care of the kids and home and sleeping alone.
As most fire wives know, most anything that can go wrong will go wrong on shift day(s). Missed holidays and events, last-minute changed plans. Things that go bump in the night.
Our lives are pretty darn frustrating (and I don't even work a full time job like you do. I don't know how you manage!).
But venting our frustrations about these things doesn't diminish his job, and if my FF didn't come home tomorrow I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be thinking "OH GOD, if only I hadn't asked him to vacuum the bedroom last night!"
FFW ISN'T the only private fire wives group, you know.
Oh yes, I totally understand!! I'm glad you didn't leave. :) I often have to remind my husband that even though he's home, the work doesn't end until the kids are asleep. THEN we can relax!! And I was going to say the same thing as Melissa, that the rest of us are probably just as likely to not return home one day. Between childbirth and driving so much, I think I may have him beat as far as risks taken!!
ReplyDeleteSO glad you didn't leave! I myself can only take it a few days at a time, then I'll catch up at my own pace. Glad I found your blog ;-)
ReplyDeleteThanks to all my gals. And this is why I stay with the groups. These are my people, they understand. And there is love to be felt. We made it through the insane week and now he is home for 10 days, which gives be a few moments to breath. Ahhhhhh.
ReplyDeleteLadies, you are all amazing and I am so grateful to have you all "here" with me. Please know that you are indeed all appreciated.