It is SO Hard When They Believe You Know Nothing

This is one of those times where I wish I was a 8-3 teacher, who graded only what she could get done during the school day and left all school related issues at the door.  I wish I could.

I have a former student, already graduated - so she is a big girl.  As I am perusing my Facebook feed, I notice her picture - throwing up gang signs - and my blood begins to boil!  I scroll down her wall and I see a posting regarding VLN.  I instantly inbox her telling her I wish I was close enough to bop her upside the head.  Then I start looking through her pictures...the tattoos she has had done - clear as day,  the gang bangers and their pieces.  I look to see who she has tagged in these pictures.  My stomach sinks.  So, now I go through her feed.

"I love my bruthas and sistas of this Almighty Vice Lord Nation...Happy Holy Divine Day 55"

There's my neon billboard - she is gone.  I've lost her. We had a heated discussion, because I will be danged if I am going to let one of my girls go blindly and without a fight.  And she starts telling me about all the good they do for impoverished blacks in their communities - they are an "organization that has been around since the '50s."  It is all on the up and up.  They are trying to empower her. And I literally shake my head at my monitor.  Really?  She bought that?  I reassured that I would be there no matter what, there is nothing waiting for her at home - which is why this leap makes sense.  She is not hearing anything I am saying.  My stomach is tied in knots.  My head is throbbing.  I still can't make her see.  But I wish I didn't care.  I have buried 18 kids, I don't need to bury another.  I only hope she realizes what she has gotten into before it is too late to get out of.  God Speed, Gilligan Girl. God  Speed.

Teaching knows no boundaries...

I have been teaching for 13 years.  Being a high school teacher, my kids from work seem to grow up really fast. I have a few kids that have begun to look at fire fighting in recent years.  One is a senior and a member of MFD's Explorer post - funny to see him at the BIT this summer.  Another graduated a few years ago.  The second student graduated in 2008, I think.  He has been part of the Butler Fire department (a tiny Milwaukee suburb) since then, as a volunteer FF.  He found me on Facebook chat this morning.  I asked how classes were going, he was to be starting Firefighting II soon, and I got a shocking response - he doesn't want to go into firefighting anymore because it is not conducive to starting a family.

I thought that was very interesting.

I told him, that I saw his point.  I am not sure I would have dated/married a firefighter.  I married an elementary school teacher.  I told him it is hard on this side of the story and we chatted a bit. My student's discussion focused on the fact that I  found it hard, and our relationship had already developed that friendship base that would be necessary to get us through.  If that was true, how could he ever hope to find the right one and start a family.   Our discussion lightened up a bit after that, but it got me thinking.

How can I help him realize that it does not have to be either/or?  How do I help him to find that you can have a family and be a tremendous community asset as a firefighter?  Especially since I am struggling to find my place in this firefighting world. Perhaps it is not my place.  Perhaps he just needed someone to see that not everyone is cut out for this world and let him know that it is okay.  I don't know.  Did I drop the ball?  Should I have questioned him more to make sure that this was not the fears of a girl in his life derailing his goals?  I don't know.  I do know that firefighting may have just lost a wonderful member of the up and comers, and that is okay.  It is not a world for everyone.