Back in the Saddle Again

My FF has been off for a few weeks.  He took care of our daughter after her surgery, so I did not have to take off of work, although I would have loved to be home with her.  He spent a few days by his parents up north helping his parents.  He helped me every morning getting the kids ready for school.  He spent his time off helping people.  It is what he does best.   He also missed 2 big fires, a rolled over semi and several EMS calls - and that was one shift.  He needed to go back.

Yesterday he went back to work - right into a 48, with another shift on Monday.   I secretly started to panic earlier this week.  Somehow I was instantly back to where I was at Christmas time - we were all locked in the house, I was overwhelmed and sad, alone on Christmas.  It was not a pretty picture.  I thought for sure I would be right back there - afterall, I still had to grocery shop, do laundry, write my final and plan my reviews - even though I won't be in my class due to service week for the seniors.  All of this I have to do with J being a work for 3 out of days.  But it is amazing what 70 degrees and sun can do for the soul.  Grocery shop before the kids are out of bed. Send the kids outside before the sun. Get some work done - and amazingly, it is not so bad.

Or, it could be just that I have truly adjusted to this lifestyle and now it is second nature, even though my over-planning brain tends to worry.

Tomorrow, J comes home.  We have the St. Florian's Mass for the firefighters in the morning and a celebration of D's birthday, along with J's mom's b-day.  Then we have one last full week of school.  And my FF will home to help me get the muppets moving on that dreaded Monday morning.  Life is good, even when it is crazy.