Please join me as work to make sense of my life as a fire wife. This is his TRUE calling. He was a tremendous elementary school teacher, but this is definitely where he sees himself happy. This is my journey to acceptance and support for my husband's dream job come true. Real, sometimes raw and almost uncensored.
"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you. . . when you walk through the fire, you will not be burned. . .for I am the Lord your God"
Our plans for last night got cancelled due to the impending, which really stinks because it was the one band I wanted to see in the series this summer. AND, it was something that wold keep the muppets occupied, since my lovely FF pulled and OT shift. (Thank you, honey!) Ah well. I asked some other firewives what their plans were for the evening. The lovely Val, founder of FirefighterWife.com and bloggess extraordinaire, and I were chatting. Her night involved watching scary movies with the kids. I might have been a touch jealous. I love scary movies - as long as they scare me. Cheesy movies, I save for going with a big group and being obnoxious in the theater. I would LOVE to share experience this with my kids, BUT...
The girls, clearly too young. My boys - B is just not interested. N, yeah...he's a real tale. He LOVES to be scared. He totally believes ghosts are everywhere. There are no fakers in the world of ghost hunting as far he he's concerned. N LOVES Ghost Adventures - that is his perfect Saturday night. Except that he then freaks himself out. And can't sleep. He is definitely NOT the right partner for me and my scary movies.
Me, I was watching Poltergeist and American Werewolf and Amityville Horror when I was 7 - no lie. The only movie that every freaked me out was The Elephant Man - and that was all because he moved into my closet. Not my fault. He had no business being in there, it was crowded enough with all the junk I had stashed in there. No wonder he came out at night...
So, Cabin in the Woods was my choice... What did you do during the storms last night??
This whole blogging venture started as a quasi journal. Adjusting to life as a firewife was not what I had envisioned. Packing up and moving my classroom to a school 2 counties away, with 4 muppets in tow was not a fun way to start. Then come conferences and open house, while my FF is still in the academy, having to drive an hour and a half both (From school and back - in rush hour) ways to drop the kids off at my dad's, just to drive it again later in the night, was making me crazy. There was no break. Full time mom, full time teacher and full time wife to a husband I was beginning to think was a figment of my imagination, was eating me alive.
Sometimes I think I vent too much on here. Sometimes I think I focus on what is bugging me, just so I don't keep it locked up and let it consume me. So here is a happy post.
Hubby worked yesterday. I took the kids to have their pictures taken. I haven't gotten all four together in quite some time. I also got a few with me in them, because I have very few pictures of us together. I am usually taking the pictures. The kids were AMAZING. The photographer was amazed.
Those dang tones...again.
We stopped at the golden arches for lunch on the way and stopped to see Daddy at a new firehouse. He is homeless for a bit. He starts Tuesday at his medhouse, which is the same house he did his field experience, but until then he kinda goes where he is needed. The kids love that we stopped in to see him. He ate lunch with us in the bay. Well, he started to eat lunch...until the tones went off. Then it was, "Bye Daddy".
The Lt. was nice enough and let us hang out until they got back. 21 is an older house, turn of the century-ish. I showed the boys the steep stairs and explained that they were so steep to keep the horses from coming up them at night.
The kids tried to sit politely while we waited in an empty firehouse. They were so excited when the med unit came back, even though the engine was still not back. And thrilled when they got to play in a new (to them) engine. I don't think that will ever get old.
We had a lovely dinner at Culver's, started to watch the Brewers absolutely implode and then came home. When Daddy got off shift, he picked me up for a breakfast date at Perkins - including a Peanut Butter Silk pie, which is mine to do with as I see fit, per Daddy. But, you know I will share it with my muppets. He also indulged my desire to pick up a few more paint chips for the new house, as well as look at cabinets for the kitchen, which I know he was not in the mood to do.
It was a lovely start to my weekend. I can't wait for the pictures to be in. I am so excited. I love new pictures!
So, there is my sunshine and butterflies for you today. Now, I am off to continue season 3 of Mad Men, while my girlies and FF nap and the boys are watching something downstairs. Happy Saturday! Hug your kids and kiss your firefighters.
My poor N does not like homework. LOVES school, hates homework. Since he was in 4 year-old Kindergarten and was supposed to learn how to write, he has seen homework as beneath him. "Mom, when I am a world famous paleontologist, my assistant will write everything for me." I kid you not, out of the mouth of babes. Not good when for the boy when your parents are teachers AND your Daddy teaches in your school. Fast forward seven years and he's a 6th grader in my building now, we are the Upper Campus (6-12). He will be here, with me for another SEVEN years! Email in my school email from a school teacher in my building yesterday evening...
N has some late math assignments. They are:
P. 145 - due today but he did not follow the directions and got them all wrong, so he decided not to hand it in and re-do it.
P. 136p. 101p. 68football line plots.
If you could reinforce my message to get the late work in before Friday so I do not have to report on late assignments at conferences, I would appreciate it.
Sigh. And since J has so much homework himself in PM classes, that leaves me to be the hammer. Double sigh. In between brainstorming ideas for post-prom, grading papers, soothing my crying 3 year-old who hates school, making dinner because I forgot to put stuff for the crock-pot together, ugh. Sigh again.
After dinner, my FF and I were dealing with some pre-teen angst over loading the dishwasher. Our oldest didn't feel he should have to do and sat on the kitchen floor. While we were rationalizing with the insanity of the tween psyche, there came a scream from the backyard and in came our toddler - hand on her head, in tears. I was prepared to kiss her boo-boos since my magic kisses still work. Until she took her hand off her head and started gushing. Turns out she tried to use our oldest's skateboard - no good.
We got her cleaned up, took a look at the hole in her head and decided she needed to be either glued or stitched and so Daddy was going to take her in. However, there was a few issues with that scenario - A) We do still have 3 other kids and it is still a school night, B) This was going to be 2 man job - someone had to keep pressure on her head while we were in transit, C) O wasn't leaving my lap. So, we called Grandpa and acted as chauffeur, while Daddy tended to the other muppets.
We were in and out in less than an hour, 90 minutes round trip. Pretty good, I was impressed. Cleaned her up, glued her shut and sent us on our way. O is a trooper. She handles pain and tragedy amazingly well. So, we are home, she is in bed, with a lovely story to tell.
I live in Wisconsin. Snow is a part of life. It may slow us done, but it does not stop us. Monday, after work, I dropped the boys off at home (knowing Daddy was only five minutes behind me with the girls) and headed to the store. I am wholly convinced the storm did not hit until late Tuesday night because I took this step. Had I told myself, "Eh - I can go tomorrow." the heavens would have opened up and we would have an additional 6 feet of snow. I took my reusable grocery bags and headed off to Woodman's - my new love.
Now, once you get over the sheer magnitude of the the place, Woodman's is awesome. I can now run-in and grab what I need, without having to stop and ask for directions or use an atlas. I have fallen in love. Monday was a rare treat - yes, going to the grocery store was a treat! Why might you ask? Simple, I did it without children. It was a pleasant 45 minutes, as I am a power shopper. Even with 4 phone calls from Daddy or one of his evil minions. I did not have to worry about who was grabbing what, who was touching whom, who needed to go potty when it is a 10 minute walk to the bathroom. It was nice!
Now, I realized how sad this was when a gentleman stopped my on my way back from the frozen food section. He asked why I was so happy. After a puzzled look, he explained. I guess I was either singing along to the elevator music or laughing at the kids who were calling for their Daddy to have me pick up something he wanted - every time he passed me. I think he was going one way down the aisles and I was going the other. He couldn't understand how I could be happy with the roads as messy as they already were, the impending blizzard and the mere fact that I was doing the tedious chore of grocery shopping. I simply replied, "I have four children and they are at home with my husband." He smiled and we exchanged some pleasantries and on our way we went.
After that discussion, I realized a simple fact of life. My life is no longer my own. I no longer have time away from the house without at least one child. I used to have at least part of my drive to school without any kids - that is gone for the next 14 years. If I run to the store, I usually have all four muppets, or at least Olivia. So, to be away from them for a mere 45 minutes, was a treat. Not to say that I don't love my children, just that I like me, and should find a way to spend more time with - me.
My firefighter is most assuredly working hard downtown at Engine 2! And I don't bug him during the day unless someone is dying - then I would probably call E38 and have them relay the message for me. ;) Instead I am basking in my own glory. He will have to wait until after his nap tomorrow to enjoy the radiant glow I am currently emitting.
Drumroll, please.............
I THINK WE MAY BE DONE WITH DIAPERS!!!!!!!
Now for some, this may be a, "eh, whatever" moment, but you must understand something. With the exception of about a 6 month hiatus between potty training B and D joining our family, we have been with diapers and or Pull-ups since the world was worried about Y2K destroying our entire infrastructure! At first, they were so cute and so nicely stacked on the changing table. I couldn't believe how small they were, until I had to buy preemie diapers because the newborn size was swallowing my baby. They were so tiny and cute. Then there was the wipes warmer and the little changing table holder doodad. It was all so new-mommy-ish, I am a bit embarrassed in hindsight. I loved the diapers, the powder, the cute little bag.
But NOW, it is time for diapers to GO!!
Potty training our oldest was an interesting time period. The first round was right before we bought our house, moved and had a baby 2 weeks later. TOO much for a 2 1/2 year old. Second round was a mixed bag - N would be dry all day at school (he went to K3 half day at a school for just the kindergarten crew) and the whole afternoon at the sitter's. Once he got home, he just peed. Behind the recliner in the family room, along the fence when our neighbors were having their friends over for a bonfire, in his Pull-up - you name it, he probably peed there.
Our next was EASY - put him in undies and DONE in a matter or days. I thought to myself, "See, this is my experienced mommy insight at work." HA! The potty training gods became aware of my foolish thoughts and gave me D.
Girls - supposed to be easier to potty train, right. And D was - for a week or so. I thought (Foolishly to myself again) - "HA! I will be done with her and only have one in diapers before she is 3!" Wouldn't that have been nice! Then she started going poop in the potty. It splashed her butt and she FREAKED out! Refused to poop - in a Pull-up or otherwise. Here is where the gods of potty training punished me for my arrogance. SHE DID NOT POOP FOR WEEKS. Went to the doc, put her on a stool softener, laxative - you name it, we did it. We ended up spending 5 days at Children's Hospital. That stubborn girl refused to poop after THREE DAYS of GO-LITELY through an NG tube - you know that horrible stuff they give you before a colonoscopy. SHE REFUSED TO POOP! So we spent days - walking around the 8th floor in our sunglasses, with our purse - making everyone ooooohh and ahhhh over us, every hour. She basked in the glory of her cuteness, but did not POOP!!!! She had an oversized ball (think somewhere between a softball and playground ball) of poop in her colon and it became so messy and painful, that it took 4 of us to change her or hold her down when she could begin to go. She was a few months away from 3 and not comfortable pooping the potty until nearly 4.
With O - I learned my lesson and went humbly into her potty training. No agenda, no rushing, no arrogance. Just a goal of before the next school year - more than enough time, with a summer for comfort. So, we have been potty training since Thanksgiving. She is great for me and N. Refused to go for Daddy, Grandpa, our sitter, just N and Mommy. Finally our sitter has a come to Jesus meeting with her and the sat in the bathroom, and sat and sat some more. Until she finally PEED IN THE POTTY! So, since we have been back from Christmas break, she has been dry for Brenda. Daddy, is another story. So, I decided to go with what worked - you would think after potty training FIVE kids in the last 12 years (including our nephew) I would know what works. Into undies we go. No more Pull-ups except when sleeping. And we have been dry for four days.
Here's to hoping this is for real. I am not SAYING she is potty trained, just hoping. Oh powerful gods of potty training, please know that I learned my lesson and will not be arrogant in my daughter's success. Just quietly glad to be done - maybe.
Halsey and her gaggle o' fraggles
Ariel is on the right
I don't often worry too much about who reads what. This is more a tool for me to make my way into this fireworld with my sanity intact. I have met some great people because of it. But now I am asking for your help. If you could send this out to your circle of friends and family, I would be so thrilled.
Ariel as a pug, with me as the Cat-teacher.
I graduated from a high school for the performing arts, where I was a music major and was lucky enough to spend a few years teaching (history) there as a grown up. I LOVED my kids there! They are different kind of kid, even though I am the first to say kids are kids are kids. I am where I need to be for my family, but these are the times I miss that world. Some of those kids became as close to my own as they could possibly, without actually being mine. Ariel is one of those.
Sometimes I could not get rid of my girls even when class was over. I look so thrilled.
One of my girls from a few years back - I think she was from the class of '09 is a finalist in an animation submission contest. She sent me a quick note on Facebook - "Psssst. Halsey :D..." with a link to the contest page -nothing else. So here I am, pandering for votes for my girl.
She even has my earrings in here- Gosh, was I really this grumpy?
Please take a look at this link and vote for Ariel Rivas - she is the second submitted piece down. She is very talented and very creative - with ideas POURING out of her head. And if you feel so inclined to pass on the link to your circle of influence to vote for my girl, I would so appreciate that as well.
As parents, we all know that life with kids, especially four of them, is never boring and rarely quiet. Imagine living with Muppets.
Bet you didn't know my kids were Muppets - yup it is indeed the truth. They are not regular kids - they are caricatures - not REAL kids. I am just amazed at how distinct their personalities are. Let me introduce you...
Our oldest is known as Noah, but really he is Waldorf. One of the cranky old men from the Muppet Show. You know, one of the dynamic duo, the Siskel and Ebert of the Henson world. They sit in the balcony and make their opinions well known for all to hear. That is Noah. He is uber-smart - sometimes to point of scary, but very critical of others and has been a cranky old man since probably the second grade. Even is younger brother has gotten in on he action. His nickname for Noah is CNH. Not because he is sweet like the sugar, but rather because it stands for Cranky Noah Harrington. (PS - pay attention to the portion with Miss Piggy - she'll come up later.)
Brennan is our next Muppet. He is a keep everyone happy, go with the flow and laugh as much as possible kind of kid. He has been in glasses since 5 and so he even looks the part. Brennan is definitely Scooter. He is always on the go, always trying to get things to go his way (and often successful) always trying to organize events and always the one who seems to catch it from the other Muppets when things are not QUITE the way they believe they should be.
Desiree - what can I say about Desiree. Who else could Desi be but Miss Piggy? Des has been singled out since she was a baby - she was a Gerber baby. She even figured out at such an early age, that people were talking about her and if she tilted her head, they would oo and aah even more. <GAG> She is a princess, and the world treats her as such. If she does not get her way....let's just say, I hope you can hold your own!
And then there is Little Livy. Do not let her age or size fool you. She may be the size of an average 12-18 month old child, but she is not one to be bullied. Being the youngest of four, Olivia has learned that you need to fight for your position. She makes up her mind and no one will be able to tell her that she cannot do something. Size will not stop her. Liv also has a bit of a, umm, what you could call a wild side to her. She is a rough and tumble kinda gal and sometimes hard to understand. She becomes a different creature when she is hungry or thirsty, a bit of an Animal, I guess you could say, when food is not readily available. If nothing else- she will steal her sister's food while the diva has her moments!
Well, there you have it - our Muppets. Hopefully they bring a smile to your face as they do mine. Happy Saturday!
Our firefighter slept most of the day away yesterday and is in the kitchen as we speak getting ready to go today. Being low man on the totem pole he was mandated to work on Christmas Day - the joys of being a cub. Nice thing about that is now they have to literally go through the ENTIRE department before they can come back and make him work a day he is not scheduled, which could be several years. He is number 486 of firefighters, so they have to go through everyone AFTER him and then back through everyone on the list before him.
My school Christmas party was scheduled for the 12th of December, I talked Jeff into switching with a cub on a different shift at is house so he could meet everyone (this is my first year at St. Joe's). Wouldn't you know it - cancelled due to weather. Shocking, considering it is in winter in Wisconsin. Now, the trade has come to be paid back and he will have to work the 29th. Which means he will have worked the 24th, 25th, home on the 26th, working on the 27th, home on the 28th, working on the 29th and 30th and finally home on the 31st. Then he is off until the 5th of January.
Now, I was thinking, perhaps there was a conspiracy at work here. My hubby gets out of any possible family drama at the holidays, does not have to deal with any over-tired toddler meltdowns and gets to avoid the cabin fever of four kids home for break. He is off for 5 days JUST as we all go back to school leaving him with just Olivia for most of next week. Hmmm, maybe he is smarter than I gave him credit for!! :)
We have 3 big dogs as members of our family. Willow, a 12-year-old golden is the leader of a pack. She has been the big boss since we got her. Will was our first and last pup. Everyone else has been from a rescue. Curly is our resident old-timer, he is a 17 year-old golden. We got Curly Q at the age of 9, thinking he had a paralyzed larynx, finding out he had mega-esophagus instead. After 8 years, we are still making Curly Shakes for him for breakfast and dinner. 2 years ago, we found out he had cancer, the doctors told us to just hope we could make it through the next few weeks, so we did not lose him on Christmas. And then there is Bear. Bear is a 2 year-old great pyrenees. He is definitely a polar bear. His original owner began to train him as an assistance dog, not realizing how monstrous in size he would become. So, if Bear wants ice - he gets it from the door dispenser. If Bear wants some fresh air, he opens up the casement window, after pushing up the lever and turning the crank. When Bear wants Bread, he does not have to get it from the bread box - I had to put that away, he could too easily access it - he opens the microwave and gets it from there. Don't let his dexterity and size fool you, he is the biggest of my babies.
My Polar Bear in summer's best.
The Geriatric Ward - Curly and Willow
Bear is used to getting what he wants. Last night/this morning Bear was chewing on a bone, moved on and went back to sleep somewhere else. Willow came to snuggle with me and picked up where Bear left off and gnawed on the bone for a while. Bear decided he wanted to claim it back. We had an argument on our hands, I reached down to move Bear away and CHOMP - I literally stuck my hand in his mouth. At first it seemed not so bad, but as I walked out to the kitchen to clean it up, my ears started ringing, tunnel vision started and I had to sit down. As is was sitting at the island, I realized that would probably end up on the floor as my head starting spinning. Better to do it voluntarily. Jeff took me to the ER, got me settled and came back to tend to the kids.
This is the bite they are concerned about.
Holy Swelling, Batman.
Now...had this been tomorrow, what would I have done? 4:30 in the morning. My first response is to say I would just pack them up and take them with. But I don't know if I could have driven. Especially not with 4 kids in the car. Now, I was done by 7am. Perhaps I could've left Noah in-charge, armed with cereal and Nick Junior, but I am not so sure I like that. My dad would be up at that time, so I guess I could have called him to get the kids ready and see if his parents would be willing to watch the girls once they got up so my dad could get to work. So, homework for this firefighter's wife - figure out your emergency Jeff's not home back up plan.
So, off I will go, with my very sore mummy hand - to make my contingency plans.
My firefighter is still adjusting to his schedule. He has offered to take the "Watchman" position through the night. Simply put, he monitors the radio traffic and answers the phone and door calls through the night, while the other guys sleep upstairs. This leaves him trying to get back on a sleep schedule on his off days. Especially after his last shift - it was radio only, no tones. That makes for a very long night for him. I am trying to be patient and let him sleep as long as he needs, to nap as much as he needs to. But that leaves me as a single mommy on his shift days, as well as a good portion of his off days.
Today, I kept the kids quiet while he slept. Our favorite firefighter joined polite civilization around 9:30am and instantly announced he was going to run down to Engine 30 to grab a light he ordered from one of the guys. I kid you not, the moment he left, our lovely muppets - who had been so nice and quiet while Daddy slept - erupted in a sea of screams. Livy was ticked off that Brennan was cleaning the toy room, Brennan was furious that Liv made a mess (even though I tried to tell him that is just what 2 year-olds do), Desiree was mad that Daddy left without taking her, making sure everyone knew that she was dissatisfied and our oldest, Noah, was making his indignation at my request to clean up his desk, VERY well known. I left. In my bare feet and fire academy sweats, I went out and stood on the deck (in 28 degree weather). I counted to 10, counted again and again and again and again...
I know everyone is having to adjust to this new lifestyle, but I feel like I am the only one making the adjustments with the kids. I feel (knowing full well that perception is not necessarily reality) as though Jeff is making the adjustment to HIS new lifestyle, but not ours. Please tell me that we will hit our stride and find our routine, please.
