A Calling

Ever just feel it tugging at you and no matter how you try and dismiss it, you still  feel that draw.  You try and ignore it and focus on where you are "supposed" to be focusing your energy, but you lose focus.  This is probably how my husband felt all those years.  Afraid to talk to me about the fire service, but still feeling that pull.  I'm glad he got the nerve up to have that chat, and even more thankful that I was open to it.

That is where I am right now.  

TORN.

Torn between doing what is responsible for providing for my family and what I feel a true calling.

Torn between doing what is expected and where I see a VERY REAL need.

Torn between my head and my heart.

TORN...

But, aren't we all.  


Anyway, speaking of callings.  My hubby's worlds have collided.  He is teaching a wellness in-service and planning another for the next couple of weeks. (I'm still anxious for life to go back to normal and for him to be on shift!)  And it is making a difference.  He is focusing on depression, substance abuse and suicide in the fire service.  If any of the FFs refer themselves to EAP it makes this effort a success.  Think of how many others will start talking to their families and thinking about where they are.  And that is all you can ask for.  So amazing to see my amazing teacher husband surface through all that bunker gear. 

So, maybe it is time to follow my own advice and follow the heartstrings.  Atlanta is just two days away - FlameFest 2013, here we come.  Those of you who are attending, I can't wait to meet you in person! Those of you who are not, hopefully next year! My hubby is packing up three of the muppets AND the polar bears and heading up to his parents house.  Crazy and insane, but such a good week coming up.  Wake me up Tuesday, I will probably sleep through Monday.