Who needs TV - I live with the Muppets.

As parents, we all know that life with kids, especially four of them, is never boring and rarely quiet.  Imagine living with Muppets.

Bet you didn't know my kids were Muppets - yup it is indeed the truth.  They are not regular kids - they are caricatures - not REAL kids.  I am just amazed at how distinct their personalities are.  Let me introduce you...

Our oldest is known as Noah, but really he is Waldorf.  One of the cranky old men from the Muppet Show.  You know, one of the dynamic duo, the Siskel and Ebert of the Henson world.  They sit in the balcony and make their opinions well known for all to hear.  That is Noah.  He is uber-smart - sometimes to point of scary, but very critical of others and has been a cranky old man since probably the second grade.  Even is younger brother has gotten in on he action.  His nickname for Noah is CNH.  Not because he is sweet like the sugar, but rather because it stands for Cranky Noah Harrington.  (PS - pay attention to the portion with Miss Piggy - she'll come up later.)

Brennan is our next Muppet.  He is a keep everyone happy, go with the flow and laugh as much as possible kind of kid.  He has been in glasses since 5 and so he even looks the part.  Brennan is definitely Scooter.  He is always on the go, always trying to get things to go his way (and often successful) always trying to organize events and always the one who seems to catch it from the other Muppets when things are not QUITE the way they believe they should be.

Desiree - what can I say about Desiree.  Who else could Desi be but Miss Piggy?  Des has been singled out since she was a baby - she was a Gerber baby.  She even figured out at such an early age, that people were talking about her and if she tilted her head, they would oo and aah  even more. <GAG>  She is a princess, and the world treats her as such.  If she does not get her way....let's just say, I hope you can hold your own!

And then there is Little Livy.  Do not let her age or size fool you.  She may be the size of an average 12-18 month old child, but she is not one to be bullied.  Being the youngest of four, Olivia has learned that you need to fight for your position.  She makes up her mind and no one will be able to tell her that she cannot do something.  Size will not stop her.  Liv also has a bit of a, umm, what you could call a wild side to her.  She is a rough and tumble kinda gal and sometimes hard to understand.  She becomes a different creature when she is hungry or thirsty, a bit of an Animal, I guess you could say, when food is not readily available.  If nothing else- she will steal her sister's food while the diva has her moments!

Well, there you have it - our Muppets.  Hopefully they bring a smile to your face as they do mine.   Happy Saturday!

"I may have made a tiny mistake."

AOkay - I get the whole smack talk, bravado of the male species.  I have been in a secondary school setting for 14 years experience.  There are more male teachers than female in most high schools, the boys demonstrate this strutting on a daily basis.  The whole, mine is bigger than yours mentality - foolish, but I get it.

Yesterday, I had a meeting at school at 6:30pm.  Now, we live an hour away from my school.  The boys attend the lower campus of my school.  I did not want to brave rush hour traffic back to Milwaukee to drop off the boys, just to instantly turn around and return to Kenosha.  So, my lovely husband brought the girls down, we had dinner.  Life was good.

As we pulled into the parking lot and I was ready to get out of the car, he quietly says, "I may have made a tiny mistake."  So I start thinking; he volunteered to work when we had plans, told his family we'd do something I did not want to do, something broke...  Nope, he "may have mentioned to the guys" that I can drink a lot of men under the table.  This was not a falsehood.  I am not a big girl.  I am not a big drinker.  HOWEVER, I do have a very high tolerance.  All of this came up in a discussion of our upcoming gathering.  A week from tomorrow - all the guys from 2 on the Blue are going to get together.  I WAS looking forward to this.  Now - I am not so sure.  I am not sure I am in the mood for testosterone laced pressure to drink more and more and more, just because I can.  This could be my chance to prove myself and be one of the guys - back to my college days.  But that is not where I am.  I am a grown up...we'll see.  Will I be the grown up who is annoyed with all the drunks as I was for their graduation party or will I be the grown-up who sleeps until noon on Sunday?  Men!

Olivia - Part 2 - How can I hope it is ONLY diabetes?

So, Little Livy

joined us at 29

weeks - weighing a whopping 1500 grams. The only thing that saved her from damage from the lack of O2 - she a cord the size of a full-term baby. Olivia is my miracle baby. She was a resident in the NICU for 49 days, coming home the day after Brett Favre's first tearful good-bye. She weighed a whopping 4#15oz and was perfect in every way! I was SO excited when she came home. Olivia was in preemie clothes from the time she came home in March, well into summer. I think we finally hit newborn clothes sometime around the end of July! She was crawling by the beginning of August. What a sight that was to see - an 8 pound baby, up crawling! Liv was always my miracle baby. I found out later - no one expected her cerclage to hold. I was glad no one told me until after the fact!  

This past summer, I finally got an ophthalmologist to take a look at her.  Our doc was worried that it was neurological.  My little Livy would run into walls, trip over the dogs (hard to do when they weigh 100+lbs), the cracks in the floor would reach out and grab her feet, bringing her tumbling down.  You get the idea.  I was told it would get better as her coordination and balance improved.  Well...it didn't.  We got a doc that felt confident they could handle an exam that was based purely physical.  Liv was obviously not going to read the chart nor was she going to tell you which was more clear.  And lo and behold - she is horribly far-sighted.  Making matters worse - one eyes is significantly worse than the other, giving her a personal set of "beer goggle" eyes.  Glasses and hallelujah, she is significantly less clumsy! 


This time around - our doc listened right away.  Olivia is tiny.  She will be three in 13 days and weighs a whopping 26.4#, up from 25.8# in July.  She wears 12-18 month clothing.  But here is the oddity - she eats adult portions - an entire steak and all the fixings, 2 chicken breasts plus sides, 6-8 pancake with 4-6 sausages - you get the idea.  She is a pig.  So the question is where does it go?  Liv is also a camel - she will drink and drink and drink.  And, when you tell her enough - she will get a tea cup from "her" kitchen and get water from the dogs' bowl or the toilet bowl.  (Not sure which is worse!  Ewwwwww!)  If those options are blocked to her, it becomes a desperate plea for liquids.  She probably takes in close to a gallon of fluids everyday.  So, potty training, is as you can imagine, on hold.  So, we get her in - have been monitoring her sugars - some days she wakes up over 300 others 69.  Doc runs an A1C - comes up with odd results.  Off to the endo we go.  Find out - yup, there is something wrong.  But what that is - God only knows.  So we are now on a fishing expedition.  It could be the start of diabetes or it could be an issue with her pituitary gland or it could be a growth on her pancreas or or or or....it is a fishing expedition. 


So today, I did not serve breakfast to any of my kids, for fear of the wrath of Olivia.  Boys hid cereal in their backpacks, Desi was left with instructions for Miss B to make sure she got breakfast at school, rather than going out to the playground.   Daddy was picking Liv up as soon as his shift was over to get her labs done and hopefully we will get some answers.


So, as a mom, how can I hope it is ONLY diabetes?

The Twelve Days of Christmas

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me

• twelve muddy paws
• eleven single mittens
• ten pleas for Wii time
• nine stacks of papers
• eight touchdown screams
• seven red clad Badgers
• six hungry Halseys
• five loads of laundry
• four muppets laughing
• three tails wagging
• two tutus twirling
• And a firefighter at E2

Happy Epiphany!

http://three-kings-day.123holiday.net/

Olivia - Part 1

Just a bit of background...Hope you have the time.  I am a history teacher, that makes me a story teller.  This is a bit of a long one.

Our first 3 kids have been well planned - literally sitting down with a calendar, counting the weeks, figuring out where 27 weeks (presumed bedrest mark) would fall in relation to the school calendar and going from there.  Our first two were boys.  Jeff wanted a girl SO badly.  So badly in fact, he had himself convinced that our first was a girl.  In the delivery room FULL of staff, baby quacking (he was a 35 weeker) on my stomach - he looks over to me and says, "But honey, girls don't have penises." He had this surprised look on his face and was as serious as can be.  When we got Desiree - our 3rd 35 weeker - the doc, while really working to get my uterus to clamp down and quit bleeding, looked at me and said, "Okay, you guys are done now - you got your girl."  And after yet another horrible pregnancy, I was SO on board with that.

Flash forward fourteen months.  I went in for some ultrasounds that summer, pain - not fun.  Took care of what we needed to.  The summer goes on, pain goes away, but I feel like crap.  I am nauseous,  exhausted, my periods had been goofy for months, hence the earlier u/s.  It almost feels like I am...oh no!  , I buy a pregnancy test.  PREGNANT!  no, NO, NO!!!!!  I can't be.  I call my doc all in a panic.  She tries to calm me through the phone.  "Probably just a false positive - it happens, we just did an ultrasound, you are probably fine."  I get into the office that afternoon - TWINS!!!  Now, please realize that both Noah and Desiree started out as twins.  The only reason I know this is because I had an u/s as soon as I found out I was pregnant due to other complications.  Vanishing twin syndrome is VERY common.  Anyway, she checks, and rechecks.  Brings in the tech - I am 7 weeks pregnant.  How can this be?????  I just had an ultrasound THREE weeks ago - babies don't just APPEAR!!  AND I DID NOT PLAN THIS OUT!!  We rechecked the other u/s - no one can figure it out!  I sat there and cried.

Acceptance comes, I wanted another baby, but I did NOT want to be pregnant ever again.  But I was - okay.  Start planning, everyone at school is excited.  Then the week of Thanksgiving break is upon us.  I am 20 weeks along. Monday - the baby isn't really moving.  Go to school, the teachers talk me into drinking some juice - no go.  Time to get into the doctor.  After 3 hours of juice and fetal heart monitors we find her heartbeat and get it nice and strong.  My OB sends me home and tells me to stay home for the week.  It is a short week - no worries.  Tuesday comes, time for one of my twice weekly appointments - all is well.  Wednesday comes - I wake up in the morning, there is a little pink on the toilet paper.  Call Jeff in - he thinks it is not big deal.  Let's check back in a bit. The second trip to the bathroom brings the same results.  On the phone with the doc again.    She thinks it is probably nothing, inquires on our level of intimacy the nigh before and tells me to come in before her first appointment - 9:45am.

Jeff brings me in, we are chit chatting, doc tells me to get into he stirrups and bump down.  The next part I will never forget, "OH S@#T!"  followed by instructions to Jeff on getting me to the ER at St. Joe's across town -NOW!  An incompetent cervix.  The bag of waters was protruding.  I get into St. Joe's see one of the other perinatologists  (Mine was gone - of course!) and after an exam we get three options.  (In my best British accent)  A)  We can do nothing and let nature take its course - I will probably lose the baby within 2 days.  (NOT appealing)  B)  We can put you in the trendelenburg position for the remainder of your pregnancy. C) Put a cerclage in - a stitch to close up the cervix. Along with TOTAL bedrest.  Butt on pillows up in the air, kind of bedrest.  After a bit of guidance from the kindly old Brit, we decide on the cerclage - which guarantees nothing.  Jeff takes Desiree (who has been with us this whole time - at the age of 18 months) to a sitter and my surgery is scheduled.

Christmas Day 2007 comes - family drama - tale for another day, I leave the house.  FIRST mistake.  Long day.  Get home.  Jeff is doing something in the family room.  I fall asleep on the couch.  I get up to go to the bathroom around 11pm, and blood rushes down my leg.  Another "Oh S@#T" moment.  Get the kids out of bed, find a friend that will take them this late at night.  Get to the hospital.  After 24 hours in antepartum - they send me home - no clue what happened.  Repeat this again 2 weeks and 2 weeks after that.  The third trip, I had the kids overnight bag packed a week in advanced.  I got up with some spotting.  Called the doc - she sent us in, I planned to be home that day, like I always had.  Dropped the three stooges off at my dad's and off we go.  They knew me well at that point.  Same story - no idea, we'll probably just keep you for a bit and send you home.  The the contractions start and won't stop.  Out comes my old nemesis - MAG SULFATE!  Ugh, let's just say - it gives me hotflashes that would make any middle aged woman pity me and makes me sicker than anyone has been after their 21st.  We prepare the room - sweatshirts for everyone else, ice is brought in, a/c is turned on and we start the bolus.  I make it most of the way through and then I need a bucket.  I get so sick my water breaks.  I get blown off by my nurse, my doc comes in to check on me and I tell her my water broke.  The nurse butts in and tells her that I just wet myself and I am overreacting.  Doc asks for a strip to check - "OH S@#T" comes out of her mouth again.  Do a quick u/s to check on the baby - she is head down, but seeing as she is only 29 weeks, the lack of amniotic fluid has pushed her up.  She is now head down - on her cord.  Emergency C- section.

Ahh - So Nice to Get Back to School

Never thought I would say that.  At the end of the summer I am usually looking forward to it - but after breaks it never seems as though there was enough time.  This is a first in my teaching career - mind you that is only 13 years, but still a decent body of work for a clear judgement.

This morning was a bit rough in the boys department.  They stayed up later than they really should have and did not want to get up and moving come shower time.  Even with the walking zombies, we still left the house at 6am, which is pretty impressive if you ask me.  This was made possible by my loving husband's decision to take his PO day yesterday.  It gave him the chance to sleep a bit more yesterday afternoon and to have an extra set of hands in the morning.  Such a luxury!  It also saved me a trip to the sitter's and 2 less muppets to get up and ready by 6am.  So nice!

The day continued - my first class consisted of many comments like - "Mrs. Halsey - seriously - I missed you."  And "Halsey, can we just hold class one day over spring break, I need my fix."  As a teacher, these are the best compliments I could get, especially considering it is a junior level Church History class.  I mean really - who misses their Church History teacher?  But, I am glad they did.  After such a stressful break, where I was feeling less than a SuperMom, this was an appreciated moment of accolades - even if it was unexpected and unnecessary.  Even my Facebook page had former students chiming in - nice to have college kids say they miss your class, especially when it was such "torture" when they were actually in the class. :)

So, my Muppets are studying/reading/practicing their name in various nooks of the house.  Daddy and Liv are on their way home from Grandma and Grandpa's in Two Rivers, I am getting ready to make Apple Pork Chops - found a recipe that sounds YUMMY - and all is right with the world again.  Organized chaos makes my life so much easier to handle!

Welcome back to school.  Mommies, hope you enjoy your first day back as much as I did!

Perhaps it Was Not All for Naught!

So my meltdown was hard - I am not a crier.  I am the "male" in our marriage.  Not to say that he is any less of a man - but he is the sensitive one.  I am the blunt one.  He can sleep through the football game - I can't miss it.  I listen to sports radio, he listens to pop.  He loves little kids and I am definitely made for the high school.  I did not like that I fell apart, but maybe it was good for him to see that I was having a hard time and needed help.  I am not good at asking for it and always have to be able to shoulder everything - with full make up and a smile.

J has been wonderful since he has been home.  Christmas break was less than enjoyable.  But we are back to normal tomorrow.  J has also seen the need for some time with the kids.  His suggestion - to go back to our "nights". We have always had family fun nights - scheduled. Game nights, movie and pizza night (so much fun because they get to eat in the family room), library nights - you get the idea.  It is so nice to hear him say we need those back.  We seem to have been on the back burner since the academy in July and now it is nice to see that he realizes there has to be some time for family as well.  Today, I literally sat down and scheduled the next 2 months - including Daddy's work schedule, Mommy's required nights at school and all our newly scheduled family nights.  It feels good to be back to "normal".  I am hoping this 5 day break recharges all of our batteries.

Who thought our organized chaos would ever look so enticing?  I am looking forward to our chaos.

Amazing How Sleep Changes Things

Two nights of sleep and suddenly my outlook is not so bleak!  Funny how that happens.  New Years Eve was nice - we spent the afternoon/evening with my brother and his family.  Our nephew was heading back to his mom's on the 1st so it was nice to see him - when he wasn't in his room texting.  (Joys of a 13 year-old boy and his 14,000 texts per month!)  My firefighter was the grillmaster - made the best rib-eyes I have had in quite a while.  We had fun watching the boys make fools of themselves on Uncle Shaun's new Wii.  It was a nice night.  After we left their house, we headed downtown to E2 to get my laptop - J was not going to let that go much longer for fear of his life.  Checked in with the cub that was on that night and headed home.  Considering we did not go out - it was a really nice NYE.  Put the Muppets to bed - considering it was 10:30 - everyone was in very good humor!  And we headed to the family room with Netflix and Coke floats. (Jealous - aren't ya!)  Mind you Ladder 49 was probably NOT the best choice of DVDs considering where my head was at - but it was nice to watch a grown up movie with no kids around.

J's shift came up today, but luckily it is his PO day.  He could have worked, but it is the last Packer game of the season, Packers vs. Bears and he was not going to miss it.  The OT would have been nice, but I am so glad he his home.  We have Daddy home until the 5th - which makes life so much easier.  I am still not sure of this new life we have chosen, but at least now - I can breathe.  That makes everything so much easier to take!

So, on to the game.  It is do or die time for the Pack - play hard or go home literally.  More than the Post-season spot that is on the line - this is a pride game.  Da Bears - considering I teach 7 miles from the IL border and I have been talking major smack from across the ocean to an Army Wife friend of mine, I need the Pack to go Bear hunting just for my personal pride!  GO PACK GO!

A New Year is Upon Us

Because J worked a 48 hour shift - there was no way anyone could steal our firefighter away from us yesterday, which was nice.  Our kids really missed seeing their Daddy on this break and I got some time with my hubby as well as a much needed extra set of hands with he Muppets.  


We had quite a lovely day - after my meltdown.  Poor hubby - he came home to a frazzled wife, boys protesting the mean mom making them clean their room, girls fighting over the ONE Strawberry Shortcake doll received for Christmas and a K9 crew that had enjoyed the 53 degree day immensely, and had the mud coating to prove it.  And he wanted to nap.  So, I let him sleep for a few hours and then my phone started to ring and ring and ring - for him.  It was his uncle.  I could not get anything done, without him texting or calling.  I was refereeing, cleaning up spills and getting frustrated. "Just call your uncle so he leaves me alone."  Not sure he heard me - he does have this miraculous skill of selective hearing, which I cannot master.  I am envious of that.  Count.....breathe...count some more.   Everyone was down in the family room hanging out with the sleeping fireman, they missed so much - so I felt a moment where I could sneak away and - GASP - take a shower ALONE!  I know it is a greedy and frivolous extravagance  to covet such things, but I thought, "Ehh, J has a had a couple hour nap - he can handle it."  Yeah right.


I locked the bathroom door to keep our 2 year-old out - she likes to come and go at will, and an open door makes that more convenient for us, albeit drafty for me.  Needless to say, she was NOT happy at my self-centered gesture.  So, she was pounding on the door, the silly, "Momma, Mommmas"  turned into more desperate pleas and then into terror filled, "But MOOOOOMMMMMMYYYYY" cries.  Being one of four, she was not to be out done.  The informant came to the door with updates on his siblings, followed by the lawyers pleading their cases.  And I thought locking the door would make for a peaceful shower. Silly Momma, showers are for OTHER people.


When I came back down the meltdown happened.  His response was, "Yeah - I was worried you would not be able to handle stretches like this."  (In such a nonchalant tone, I could not believe my ears.)  Not handle what - Christmas ALL BY MYSELF, playing Santa, WRAPPING EVERY PRESENT ALONE, waiting until midnight for the last muppet to give in, getting the kids to all the Christmas locations, including the firehouse, making FIVE pans of french toast casserole so the CREW can have a nice breakfast on Christmas morning, delivering Christmas cookies so the kids could see their Daddy on Christmas Eve, troubleshooting Daddy's Skype issues when I should be wrapping presents on Christmas Eve, so Daddy does not miss out on Christmas morning with his muppets,  keeping everyone quiet on the two days out of seven, he's been home, putting off the stack of papers that have calling for my green correcting pen, not sleeping for 5 of the last 7 nights because our great pyrenees goes on high alert when J is not home - alerting me to every noise (real or perceived), finishing the PPT for the skit the next day for J and the other cubs, two trips downtown with a fairy princess (complete with wings), a ballerina and two bickering boys - because Daddy forgot things needed for his Cubby skit (with other errands in between), sneaking out to get groceries while the girls are sleeping and hoping the boys don't burn down the house, taking in a FOURTH dog so my firefighter's uncle doesn't have a crazy lab that drives him crazy a night, not to mention the day to day struggles and adventures that come with four kids - all home for break.  Sorry, I guess I am a bit of a slacker, please forgive me.  Needless to say, my pot boiled over...perhaps it was necessary.  Still not enjoyable or pretty.


Once that was done, things actually felt better.  We had a nice afternoon by my brother's - saw our nephew before he heads back to Oklahoma today, had my grill master cook up the steaks we brought.  It was nice.  At the end of the night, we ran down to E2 - to get my laptop and allow J to be a vent for the cub on the red shift - got in trouble for having the nerve to play bean bag toss when invited by the others on New Years Eve.  What was he thinking??!!  :D  We got home and put some very overtired Muppets to bed around 10:30pm.  We threw in a movie - great movie, but probably not the best for me right now - Ladder 49.  It is my worst fear - that knock at the door.  But, it was actually a bonding moment for us.  Still...YIKES!!


So, we are at the New Year - we made it through the academy, a new school for the boys and me, the first 2 months of his probation period, our first Christmas - sans Daddy - and we are still standing.  For the New Year, I hope we find our groove and smooth are days into their routine.

May 2011 bring peace, joy and prosperity to you and yours.

My phone never rang last night

It has become a ritual - I go to bed, watch TV or read and just as I fall asleep - no matter the time - my hubby calls to check in.  Last night that did not happen.  So instead of waking up to my phone last night, I woke up to 2 half naked ballerinas, fighting over the same tutu.  I panic for a moment - look at my phone, certain that I slept through his call, only to find a dark screen.  WHAT?!  I had it plugged and on my dresser - it should have charged.

This phone is BRAND NEW - my old Centro was dying - the screen did not always come up and we stopped at the Sprint Kiosk while we were Christmas shopping and upgraded it - this phone is literally 8 days old.  My husband got the same phone and had to exchange it within a few weeks because he could only talk on speaker phone.  So, perhaps there is an issue with this model?

Now, some background - my husband and I both took a significant paycut for our current positions - essentially another salary.  Private schools don't pay NEAR as much as the public, but let me tell you - the lack of stress in the work day is worth every penny.  Same is true of a first year firefighter, not near as much as he made in the classroom - although he will make his back up, unlike me. :(  So, we had to tighten the belt a bit, and out went the house phone.  Vonage was nice - when it worked, we went through more  modems and most of the time calls were forwarded to my cell phone any way.  So we thought it was a no brainer - lose the house phone and gain some money.  Until today!

I don't like this feeling - how will anyone get a hold of me if something happens?  What if I have a seizure, how will the kids call 911?  What if Liv's sugars spike?  Since she has no dx yet, that means I have no glucagon and would have to wait until 38 got here - mind you they are literally just around the corner - but walking next door, knocking on a door, waiting for someone to answer - all takes time.  I know these are all worst case scenarios, but they are real possibilities.  I don't like this at all.

So, do I pack up all 4 kids and pray they can behave while I exchange the phone?  I know my dad has a half day today because of a dentist appt. - maybe he can take them while I run in.  I am expected to drop some stuff off at the firehouse, but I am not sure I can make all th phone calls to get the stuff I need for him.  I cannot WAIT for this time tomorrow!!

Any Nook users out there??

As I am sitting here, believing myself to be so tech savvy, I am arguing with my PC.  I LOVE my Nook - it keeps my pages, allows me to have to bring my textbook back and forth from work.  In theory - I can read any of my books on my e-library on my phone, PC or Nook.  So no matter where I am, there is something to keep my attention.  Sounds good - I love toys - was so sad when I have to give up my grade program that allowed me to sync it with my PDA, have gone through several generations of i-Pods.  I love gadgets.  The tech department at school loves me - I will pilot anything.  When there was no money for a SmartBoard - I made one, literally - out of duct tape, PVC pipe, magnets, a Wii  Mote and Bluetooth dongle.  So when I cannot get something that seems to be a no brainer, it bugs the Begeezers out of me.  It should  be as simple as downloading the software and logging in, right??  NO!

I put it off until I had time, I have time and cannot get it to play nicely - with my phone or laptop.  There are 3 titles (free classics) that appear - none of my purchases  or "real downloads".  I have searched their help section, posted on the FB Nook discussion tab, called them - only to have them tell me to, "Come on in!"  I laughed at the poor clerk.  They couldn't figure out what was so funny.  I asked if there was anyone who could work with me on the phone - No, I must come for customer service.  So...does babysitting come with this customer service? Now she laughed, of course not, why would it.  Ummm, because I have 4 kids - 2 of whom will demand my complete and undivided attention while I am trying to troubleshoot this lovely program.  Her response - "Just leave them with their father!"  Well - duh, why didn't I think of that!!  Oh yeah - "BECAUSE HE IS WORKING A 48 HOUR SHIFT AT THE FIREHOUSE!!" my mind screamed.  In this day and age, how do you presume there is a father, or that he is available.  If he were in Afghanistan would you feel bad??  Anyway, I smile at the phone and tell her politely that he has to work until Friday.  Her response - "Then I guess we'll see you then."  No think I might have to bug my dad to take the Muppets for me, so I can fix this tonight AND speak with the Customer Service manager.  The selling point for the Nook was the personalized service - this was not service at all, much less personalized.

So, in the mean time.  If anyone is a Nook user and has a suggestion, toss them my way.  I have installed and uninstalled the software, restarted the program, asked it to play nicely - all to no avail.  Let me know what your thoughts are.

Politics, tradition and common sense

I am not very good at politics.  I don't play the game well and find it to be a foolish waste of time.  There are traditions in various institutions that I LOVE, others that drive me crazy.  Just because it has always been does not mean it should always be.  Examples in the fire department- EVERY house in the department makes homemade pizza every Saturday night - I think that is cool.  The hazing period for cubs - I think is silly.  Knowing about those who came before you - imperative.  Water balanced over the doors, in the cabinets - sophomoric.  Shields with Company on it - awesome, you are a team.  Cubs not being allowed to have their name on their shields because they are not a person yet - idiotic.  These are all reasons that I would make a LOUSY firefighter.  (Not that educational politics aren't just as bad, mind you.)  Some things to me are just common sense.  The Cubs not being allowed any social contact makes no sense - don't you want your crew to bond.  How many times can the floors be mopped, the counters wiped, bathrooms cleaned in one day? There are literally 14 TVs in the house and he cannot look at a single one.  Being required to make popcorn or cookies every night  - cool, not being allowed to eat them or take part in the comradery - foolish.

Now, I get the idea - Cubs need to know their place.  Earn their stripes.  (Insert any rite of passage cliché - here.)  Last week J came home with a bit of a strange story.  His lieutenant told him there was an opening at a busier house and he needed to apply for consideration.  Engine 2 is downtown - gets calls for college kids at Marquette, the jail, the mission - almost all med calls, not many fires.  The house his LT suggested he transfer to, is significantly busier. Now, there maybe other reasons behind this suggestion - J bumped a guy off the rig and it is believed that not everyone is happy that the crew was disrupted with this cub. So, J is handed the paperwork and walked through the process  - step by step, with supervision.  He submits it to the deputy chief's box for consideration. Guys on the green shift somehow found out.  (I am finding that there are NO secrets in a fire department.  And J thought working with all female elementary teachers was bad!)  And they are PISSED!!  "Who is J to think a cub can request a transfer?", "Oh, he's too good for us, huh?", "Since when do cubs get to transfer?",  "WTF! We're not good enough!!"  And now J has to do damage control.

As soon as J came on shift, one of the cubs on the Green shift pulled him aside and gave him the heads up.  J is a bit confused - he was told to do this.  If he said no - I don't want to go to a significantly busier house - it makes him look lazy and unmotivated.  If he is excited to go to another house, it makes seem as though he has an inflated sense of self-importance.  Damned if you do, damned if you don't.  He starts talking to his captain, the other officers, the guys on his shift, his instructors at the BIT (especially since one of them saw himself in J - so much so, that he put J on the same rig, in the same house, on the same shift - that he started on in the department), the brass -all to let them know he is NOT unhappy or looking to leave, but that he was essentially ordered to do so.  Finally one of the officers on J's regular shift came into the conversation and told the rest of the guys - "No, we told him to do it." and things calmed down - a bit.

J's concerns are this - E2 has all of the Brass of the department, just upstairs - they will hear all of this.  Will this come back to bite him in the arse?  Will everyone start look at him as troublemaker?  For such a quiet, mild mannered guy - my hubby is not enjoying his 15 minutes in the spotlight.

Politics, egos - all my pet peeves, but all things J can deal with.  There is so much more to the fire science that goes into being a firefighter.  Definitely one more reason why not everyone is cut out for this world.

Our next 48 hour shift

We got our fireman home yesterday, he napped for an hour and a half, then off to the in-laws for the day.  We were up late last night putting together tomorrow's presentation - the cubs have to provide "entertainment" for the rest of the company throughout the week.  The green shift involved a live chicken.  The blue shift has this interesting PowerPoint presentation that I put together for my husband.  I feel like I am caught in a time warp -  with some silly college boys.  (Teachers don't do this!  LOL)  I hope the guys have fun with the silliness.

J is working today for one of the guys in his class and then has his shift tomorrow.  After that he has his P.O. (Personal off day - allows the guys to NOT have overtime every month, essentially an equalizer for the 24 hour shifts) and asked if he should sign up for OT that day.  Cubs can only work OT on their PO day until they have been in for 9 months.  The new chief put this policy in when he took over and there is some disagreement with it.  Mainly because the class from Feb of 2010 CAN work OT anytime they want and this recent class cannot, even though both groups are still in their cub year.  I see the logic from the chief - allows the guys to get their feet wet and figure out the system, keeps guys who are too green from being taken advantage of, keeping the new guys from burning out, etc...still not popular with all the guys.  Anyway, will have worked 5 of the last 7 days - UH - NO, you should not work.  January 2nd is the Packers/Bears game - and he is not allowed to watch TV with the other guys - at all, yet.  And January 3rd we all go back to school.  The extra hand will be very much appreciated, as sleepyheads don't want to get moving.  He agreed and I will have my hubby home for 5 days!!  YEAH!

It's just one of those days...

when nothing seems to go your way.  That would be today.

Days, where nothing you do seems to go your
Way, you just got started, but you can’t
Wait, for that setting sun to come
Be glad your day is done
And hope tomorrow ain’t just another one
Those Days

Last night, got everyone settled in - finally.  Dogs bedded down for the night.  I went down to our bedroom to read and hopefully catch some sleep.  Dozed some time after 10:30 - good time.  My firefighter called at 11:30pm.  I am not going to miss a chance to touch base with him  so we chat for a  bit.  Which all well and good, except I am one of THOSE people.  Once I am up, I am up. My firefighter, instantly falls back to sleep.  I am so jealous. So, about 2am I started to get drowsy, only to be woken up by a great pyrenees with an upset tummy at 2:30.  Mind you - I am glad he woke me up, rather than have the alternate scenario.  That cold air definitely heightens the senses and gets the juices flowin'!  Get back to bed, watch the world news, start to drift off somewhere around 4:30.  Muppets are up at 5AM!!!!


My firefighter comes home at 9.  I asked if he would be willing to do breakfast - nope he's tired, he had to get the ISO up twice last night.


I get to let him sleep for an hour, while I get the Muppets up and dressed, so I can drive ninety minutes to my in-laws and be happy and cheery.

Didn’t know when I woke up today

Waking up was my first mistake

My first mistake

Outside my window the sun is shining

Birds are singing, maybe it’s beginning to get better

You never know how it’s gonna go

It’s just one of those days

You think things might be looking up

But what’s that, a tow truck

Pulling up to your car

Of course it is

Cuz’ it’s just one of those days

A Good Time for New Year's Resolution

I have decided on 3 things for my New Year's resolutions. The girls and the k9 geriatric ward are sleeping, boys are heavily involved in Lego Clone Wars on Wii (tell me again why I bought new games!) and hubby is at work. So is as good a time as any to post them.

I am not a big one for weight loss, although it is always in the back of my mind.  I am a size 8 after our family of 4 is done, so nothing to sneeze at there.  Although, some days I look at pictures from college and think...

So first and foremost is to continue to work on this transition we are still making into being a fire family.  I did not marry a firefighter, this was never in my plans.  But, it is where we are and it is what makes my husband complete.  We made it through our first holiday season without too many hiccups.  Only once did I "swear" at my firefighter for not being home, so I think that is pretty good.  I am also working on being patient with the equity in housework as we make our way through this.  I know it sounds petty to complain about laundry, but we are a family of 6 and my work comes home with me and does not get done until after the kids's homework is done, dinner is made/cleaned up and they are all tucked in for the night.  My first resolution is patience through the chaos.

On my list were several things that came and went.  First, it had to be attainable.  I thought about giving up soda - but it is my one vice and it is currently in moderation.  Then I thought about school work - having all papers graded before I go to bed each night - that only adds more stress to my world, not really worth it. Then came laundry, I work so hard to get it all done and somewhere, I always fall back behind.  So, next resolution was laundry - I will do one load of laundry from start to finish each day. Sounds silly, but somewhere along the way I always drop the ball.  I will get 1 load done- washed, dried, folded and put away -each day.  Not including Jeff's uniforms, we have about half a load per day - this will allow me to get caught up (in time :) ) without totally derailing my routine - load will go in before I get everyone up in the morning, be in the drier before we head out the door.  Then, as I am watching TV (gives me a guaranteed 30 minutes of mommy time) I will fold the load and put it away as I get everyone to bed.

I am looking for one more, had it in my mind, and now it is gone.  That is what happens when the girls wake up before I get my list done.  Ah well.  I am certain it will come to me when I can't sleep tonight, I can always update it then.

Happy Monday!!  Thank a firefighter for helping keep your community safe.

Smarter than the average bear...

Our firefighter slept most of the day away yesterday and is in the kitchen as we speak getting ready to go today. Being low man on the totem pole he was mandated to work on Christmas Day - the joys of being a cub.  Nice thing about that is now they have to literally go through the ENTIRE department before they can come back and make him work a day he is not scheduled, which could be several years.  He is number 486 of firefighters, so they have to go through everyone AFTER him and then back through everyone on the list before him.

My school Christmas party was scheduled for the 12th of December, I talked Jeff into switching with a cub on a different shift at is house so he could meet everyone (this is my first year at St. Joe's).  Wouldn't you know it - cancelled due to weather.  Shocking, considering it is in winter in Wisconsin.  Now, the trade has come to be paid back and he will have to work the 29th.  Which means he will have worked the 24th, 25th, home on the 26th, working on the 27th, home on the 28th, working on the 29th and 30th and finally home on the 31st.  Then he is off until the 5th of January.

Now, I was thinking, perhaps there was a conspiracy at work here.  My hubby gets out of any possible family drama at the holidays, does not have to deal with any over-tired toddler meltdowns and gets to avoid the cabin fever of four kids home for break.  He is off for 5 days JUST as we all go back to school leaving him with just Olivia for most of next week.  Hmmm, maybe he is smarter than I gave him credit for!!  :)

Teaching knows no boundaries...

I have been teaching for 13 years.  Being a high school teacher, my kids from work seem to grow up really fast. I have a few kids that have begun to look at fire fighting in recent years.  One is a senior and a member of MFD's Explorer post - funny to see him at the BIT this summer.  Another graduated a few years ago.  The second student graduated in 2008, I think.  He has been part of the Butler Fire department (a tiny Milwaukee suburb) since then, as a volunteer FF.  He found me on Facebook chat this morning.  I asked how classes were going, he was to be starting Firefighting II soon, and I got a shocking response - he doesn't want to go into firefighting anymore because it is not conducive to starting a family.

I thought that was very interesting.

I told him, that I saw his point.  I am not sure I would have dated/married a firefighter.  I married an elementary school teacher.  I told him it is hard on this side of the story and we chatted a bit. My student's discussion focused on the fact that I  found it hard, and our relationship had already developed that friendship base that would be necessary to get us through.  If that was true, how could he ever hope to find the right one and start a family.   Our discussion lightened up a bit after that, but it got me thinking.

How can I help him realize that it does not have to be either/or?  How do I help him to find that you can have a family and be a tremendous community asset as a firefighter?  Especially since I am struggling to find my place in this firefighting world. Perhaps it is not my place.  Perhaps he just needed someone to see that not everyone is cut out for this world and let him know that it is okay.  I don't know.  Did I drop the ball?  Should I have questioned him more to make sure that this was not the fears of a girl in his life derailing his goals?  I don't know.  I do know that firefighting may have just lost a wonderful member of the up and comers, and that is okay.  It is not a world for everyone.

That duffel bag on the way out

Far Away by Nickelback

I am NOT making that phone call...

I just got a phone call from a family member of my husband's - asking me to have my firefighter come straight over to his house when he gets home  - to hook up his new Blue-Ray and HDMI cables.  Umm, I am not going to call my husband and tell him that before he sees his kids (which I suppose he did get to spend the holidays with us- we trekked dowtown to E2 on Christmas Eve and Christmas morning we opened presents together via Skype) and sits down he has to hook up your presents.  I am not going to tell my husband that before he eats any of the french toast casserole he missed out on at E2 because he brought a child molester back to the land of the living after a suicide attempt at the jail, that he has to do your work for you.  YOU call him.

So, my firefighter's phone rings just as he hits the door and is mobbed by the Muppets and K9 crew, and he is off to save the day, again.

A hero

As I find myself sulking because my husband is not home yet, I remind myself that he is a hero.  He worked Christmas Eve so that when the city went nuts and the 911 dispatchers had no access to phones, people could still get help.  He worked Christmas Day and brought a man back to life, as well as taking care of an apartment fire started by college kids and their candles, so they could go home and see their families. We delivered Christmas cookies on Christmas Eve to Engine 2, as well as 3 french toast casseroles (which my husband did not even get to eat because he got transfered to E26) to some hungry firefighters, also away from their families. Yes, I had to play Santa by myself and get everything ready for the big morning.  I had to get 4 kids fed, dressed and pulled away from their toys to see family.  I had to get 4 tired kids put to bed after a long day. But my husband is a hero, making sure families are safe and healthy.  I had to remind myself of that again, when he texted me to tell me he was being sent to E13 (busiest house in the city) for relief and would be late, he is a hero.   I can't wait for my firefighter to get home after 51 hours away (and counting), just to do it again tomorrow.

Such is the beginning of my life as a firefighter wife...

Happy Holidays!!

No time to post...

but as a Packer fan - have to have the time to post this.  Lambeau ROCKS!!!

Guess the dome REALLY needs to be replaced!!

Oh...it is going to be a looooooong winter

Here in the midwest, cold weather this time of year is definitely NOT unheard of.  This year is a bit different,  it was a mild fall.  We had 70s through September and 60s through the beginning of this month  To now be at or below freezing is a shock to the system.  Mind you, I have yet to put away my light leather jacket for my winter variant, so it can't be that bad, yet.  Until I remind you that I have 4 kids.

Four kids and a husband who worked last night - combine that with cold weather and you have one crazy house!!  The girls are playing tag in their princess dresses.  The boys are imitating A-Rodg in the family room - here's to hoping none of the Jordan memorabilia falls casualty to the level of energy.  All while Jeff and the geriatric K9s are trying to sleep.  I think I will send my jr NFL boys out in the elements to burn off some of this energy.  As for the princesses, I guess I will just have to deal with their world of pink dresses and clickity-clack shoes.

I know I will miss these days once they are in high school, but some days...

My moments of thankfulness:
1)  Thanksgiving - this year was with my family.  I am thankful for the time with them (and the lack of drama).  I am also grateful that my first attempt with the bird was a success.  The turkey is usually Jeff's job - but his shift was Wednesday and there was no way he would have been home in time.  So, I emptied the cavities (ewwwww) and seasoned the bird and got her in the oven.  See, being a fire wife causes you to tackle the things you would not have otherwise done. (Minor though it may be.)
2) My Nook - My newest toy has gotten me through the quiet nights without Jeff home.
3) My Dad - after a crazy day yesterday, not wanting to cook, my dad called and took us out for burgers and custard at Robert's
4) My Health - I am no longer feverish, puking or hacking up both lungs - first Sunday in quiet some time.
5) Christmas is coming - need I say more!!

Tonic Sol-fa

For graduation, among his more practical gifts, I bought Jeff tickets to see Tonic Sol-fa at the Grand Opera House in Oshkosh.  Realize I bought this tickets in July, shortly after his "I don't think I can do this" melt down after the awakening as to how physical of an endeavor this was going to be.  I also had no idea as to what is shifts would look like.  It was a gamble, but it would be so worth it.
It was definitely  Something Beautiful .

Tonic Sol-fa came to Lakeland when we were college, probably '95 or '96 and we fell in love with them then and there.  Jeff took the guys around campus, while they tried to drum up an audience and into the Bradley.  The show was GREAT!  Even as I posted in July that I got the tickets, our friends were jealous.  I don't remember too many of the concerts from LC, there were a ton, but that one stayed with me.  We saw them at State Fair a few years later.  Then, I seemed to forget about them.  (I have short term memory loss, its really not my fault!! =D ) Until there was a special on them last year.  I DVR'd it and my kids fell in love with them.  Their Star Spangled Banner...wow, is all I can say.  There are definitely 4 distinct personalities to be seen and their voices mesh amazingly well.  I am glad they have stuck to their guns and stayed true to their a capella beginnings; I am certain if you put instruments behind them, they would be with a major label, but that would so suck!!

Anyway, we went to the 4pm show - one of the drawbacks of parenthood, having to consider the needs of the muppets before your own - and OMG - I think you needed an AARP card to get in!!  We were definitely among the younger demo of the crowd.  I am certain that they all enjoyed it, but no one sang, no one clapped unless prompted by the guys, no one danced.  They all just SAT.  How do you sit during this music??  The guy next to me was less than thrilled because just can't sit still and he did not want to hear me sing, but eh, whatever.  I wish we could have stayed for the 8pm show.  Fingers crossed that they come close soon.  Most of their shows seem to be in MN - probably to stay close to home.  There were some songs I wished they had done, the jokes are still the same, the beards are bit grayer, the laugh lines more defined - but it was a great show.  At date night that was sorely needed.  It was a nice break when everyday seems to be One of Those Days.

One of the most profound moments of the night was We All Need Saving.  I can't find a Tonic Sol-fa version, but once I do - wow.  I will have it when I buy the CD that has it.  New songs I am going to have to find - Long Black Train (the country version I found when looking is just NOT the same!!  LOL)   We just have to remember Grace has brought us to where we are and we need to trust, even when it seems like all is falling apart, that it is the path we are meant to be on.

Things to be thankful for:
1) A DATE NIGHT WITH MY HUBBY - It was long over due and a great time.  It is nice to remember that we are a couple and not just Mommy and Daddy.
2) GREAT MUSIC - Too often, I believe, we don't take the time to truly enjoy live music.  We have our i-pods, the radio is everywhere...but live music.  That can't be duplicated.
3) FAMILY - having wonderful family has made life so much easier, especially as we have journeyed into the world of firefighting, and specifically last night.  My dad took the boys to the Bucks game last night so they did not need to miss out on that due to our date night and my brother took the girls for the evening and hung out with them for us.
4) MY KIDS - being away from them always makes me miss them, which reminds my how significant they are in my life and how truly blessed I am to have them in my life!
5) TERM 2 - I am almost ready for the term to start, which is more than I could say when I got up this AM!  =D    

No News is Good News...Right??

Jeff and I have an agreement to make contact once a day.  His nightly ritual involves making popcorn for the rest of his crew, working out, studying and waiting for the house to quiet down.  Ah, the life of a lowly Cub!  Usually he calls, right after I doze off, which is okay.  It takes me a bit to get back to sleep, but when I get to sleep, it is a restful sleep.  For the first time last night, my phone did not ring.  So, when I wake up at 1am and realize it - I am jolted awake.  Was there a fire that got out of hand - my firefighter is downtown, with the world of high rises, it could be.  Was is just a night of med call after med call after med call?  That is a very real possibility.  Did his battery on his cell phone die?  More than likely - this is the scenario.  But my mind has yet to shut off, and as much as I try, choice number 1 is running through my head.

So, I walk through the house.  There is a peace, that in a house of four kids, only comes in the wee hours of the night.  I talked Bear into staying in the bedroom, while I went up and checked, so as not to disrupt that peace for the sake of a secure escort.  The peaceful looks, the quiet, the light pushing through the blinds, and a peace comes over me.  Had there been some issue, I would have had a phone call or, worst case scenario there would be a knock at my door.  So, my mind is put to rest.  I realize that this is the life of a firefighter's wife.  Accepting the unknown just comes with the job description.  Mind you, it comes to me, this was not the job description at the time of that gorgeous  August afternoon 12 years ago.  And now I realize that this WAS part of the vows.  Supporting my firefighter's quest for happiness and fulfillment WAS part of the vows, and this is where that support comes in.  He was not finding that in the classroom.  Aptitude and skill do not guarantee happiness.  If a few sleepless nights, can offer that for him, so be it.  Luckily, I do not have school tomorrow, so when he comes home in the morning, I will be able to hear about his night and welcome him home, with open arms - literally.

A year of gratitude:
1)  FIRST TERM IS OVER!!!  I made peace with myself leaving the public schools, I ROCKED the first term where I knew NO ONE, had to create my curriculum out of thin air and am ready to take on the same challenges for second term.
2) PEACE - There is a peace tonight that I have not felt since 07/26/2010, perhaps it is true acceptance, perhaps it is the answer to my requests for help to get through this transition, but it is there.  It is a relief.
3) FAMILY - Dinner tomorrow, well tonight considering it is 0248, with my dad, brother and sister-in-law.  Saturday my dad is taking the boys to a Bucks game and my brother is taking the girls, so Jeff and I can go see Tonic Sol-Fa in Oshkosh.  It is nice.
4) MY DVR - Sounds silly, but it saves my sanity on sleepless nights such as tonight, by providing a distraction - an escape from reality.
5) THE HOLIDAYS - For the first time in years, I am excited for the holidays.  Ten years ago, I started mentally planning for my trees, village, gifts, etc - in July.  Then kids came and families started claiming their stakes, regardless of the needs of the babies.  I let it happen and I let it get to me.  Jeff is working Christmas Eve, the date is not important, the family gathering is.  I have accepted that and it has revitalized my holiday spirit.  It is a nice feeling.

PEACE!

The Firehouse Bug

You would think that after 12 years in a classroom, an elementary classroom no less, Jeff would have an iron-clad immune system.  But obviously firefighter immunity is different from teacher immunity.  I totally get it - 16 guys sharing that space, all bringing their various germs from home.  Then throw in their calls, especially their med calls.  Lord knows what they are exposed to out there.  Jeff comes home to 4 kids under 10 - it is a ripe formula for illness.  He has been to the doc twice this month.  Right after the academy because of a nasty cold that had turned into bronchitis (and he did not want to go while still in the academy) and yesterday - a viral infection.  Being viral, there is nothing that can be done.  So he has spent the better part of the last 5 days sleeping or working.  It is definitely kicking his butt.

However, here is where the kicker comes - I now have strep throat.  Finals are upon us, so at least I do not have to teach, but it makes for a long drive down to Kenosha at 5:45 in the morning when all you want to do is crawl back into bed and sleep the day away.  Lots of hand sanitizer and throat lozenges. Ah well.  I can be hopeful that Jeff feels better tonight so he can have muppet duty while I finish grading papers and entering grades.  Please send health filled ju-ju  our way!

My list of gratitude:
1)  Exams are almost over - I only have 1 to give tomorrow and this term is DONE!!
2)  Livy is almost potty trained - we are making it all day in one pull-up.  This will mean we will go w/o a diaper bag for the first time early January 2000!!!!!  YEAH!!
3) My family will be together for Thanksgiving - well not everyone, but a good portion.  Jeff will be coming off shift, my dad and his parents and Jeff's uncle will join us for lunch at my house.  Dinner will be at my grandmother's (other side).
4)  I love my job - think that says it all
5) Curly  - my 17 year-old golden will be with us for another holiday season.  We thought we were going to lose him 2 Christmases ago and here he is still kicking, romping with a much larger puppy.

A Month for Giving Thanks

We spend one day a year, grateful for what we have and who we love, and yet seem to forget about that as the year rolls by.  So, here is my challenge, perhaps and early New Year's resolution, for myself.  I will make a list of 5 things each day that I have to be thankful for.  When I post here, I will (try to remember) to add the list as the conclusion of my post.  So, here's my start...

1) My family - through 4 very rough pregnancies, we have been blessed with 4 healthy and wonderful children.  I have a wonderful husband, whom I hold so near and dear.  And for my dad, who has been there through everything.
2)  For a job I love - who would have thought I would find comfort and peace in a private Catholic high school, when I was such a proponent of saving the inner-city schools.
3) My health - as ironic as that is to say.  As damaged as my brain is, I should not be a functioning adult.  Luckily I was not aware of the damage until 26, my brain rewired itself and here I am.  In many cases - against all odds, but I am here.
4) MFD - After 2 years of lists, CPATs, oral interviews, written interviews, checking the city's website over and over and over, EMT classes, MFD 7/26/2010, Jeff is a FIRE3FIGHTER.  He is happy, I am thankful.
5) My K9s - no matter how bad the day, they are there.  You can snap at them and literally a moment later apologize and they forgive you.  They are comfort and companionship - even when the rest of my crew is on a mission elsewhere.

I hear the disappointment in his voice...

We made an agreement a few weeks ago that we would talk at least once a shift when he was working.  Jeff called around 10:30 last night and of course I asked how it was going.  They had ONE call.  And it was an med call - nothing too interesting.  You could just hear the disappointment in his voice.  All of the guys from the academy have been off to fires, some of them several in a shift.  And to date...he has had a total of...NONE!!  No fires.  Most of his EMS calls have been nothing too exciting or they have been called off.  Which leaves more time to clean.  Let me tell you, that is NOT one of his favorite activities.

On my way into work this morning he calls to check on my hand.  And again, how was last night.  They had one run - smoke at a nearby hospital.  I actually felt excited for him.  BUT, when they got to Sinai - it was just a steam vent.  Someone called because they noticed steam from a steam vent.  AYE!

But, here is my dirty little secret, I am relieved.  I am nervous when he is at work.  Mind you, being a high school history teacher with 4 little ones at home, does not leave much time to worry about it.  But, when it is finally quiet at the dinner table, it pops into my head.  The first moment when the "MOOOMMMMAAAAA" calls from the dark bedrooms cease and there is a peace in the air, it creeps into my to-do list.  When I realize that I am waking up alone, I can't help but hope and pray that he had a quiet night.  I know that is not what he is looking for, but I am okay with this lull.  The thought of the high rise pack having to be pulled out, does not thrill me.  The possibility of my doorbell ringing at 3am is not something I want to even think about.  When I get that 6am, "Hi Honey, another quiet night" call on my way down to Kenosha - I feel his disappointment, but also breathe a bit easier.

A bit of an eye opening...

We have 3 big dogs as members of our family.  Willow, a 12-year-old golden is the leader of a pack.  She has been the big boss since we got her.  Will was our first and last pup.  Everyone else has been from a rescue.  Curly is our resident old-timer, he is a 17 year-old golden.  We got Curly Q at the age of 9, thinking he had a paralyzed larynx, finding out he had mega-esophagus instead.  After 8 years, we are still making Curly Shakes for him for breakfast and dinner.  2 years ago, we found out he had cancer, the doctors told us to just hope we could make it through the next few weeks, so we did not lose him on Christmas.  And then there is Bear.  Bear is a 2 year-old great pyrenees.  He is definitely a polar bear.  His original owner began to train him as an assistance dog, not realizing how monstrous in size he would become.  So, if Bear wants ice - he gets it from the door dispenser.  If Bear wants some fresh air, he opens up the casement window, after pushing up the lever and turning the crank.  When Bear wants Bread, he does not have to get it from the bread box - I had to put that away, he could too easily access it - he opens the microwave and gets it from there.  Don't let his dexterity and size fool you, he is the biggest of my babies.

My Polar Bear in summer's best.

The Geriatric Ward - Curly and Willow

Bear is used to getting what he wants.  Last night/this morning Bear was chewing on a bone, moved on and went back to sleep somewhere else.  Willow came to snuggle with me and picked up where Bear left off and gnawed on the bone for a while.  Bear decided he wanted to claim it back.  We had an argument on our hands, I reached down to move Bear away and CHOMP - I literally stuck my hand in his mouth.  At first it seemed not so bad, but as I walked out to the kitchen to clean it up, my ears started ringing, tunnel vision started and I had to sit down. As is was sitting at the island, I realized that would probably end up on the floor as my head starting spinning.  Better to do it voluntarily.  Jeff took me to the ER, got me settled and came back to tend to the kids.

This is the bite they are concerned about.

Holy Swelling, Batman.

Now...had this been tomorrow, what would I have done?  4:30 in the morning.  My first response is to say I would just pack them up and take them with.  But I don't know if I could have driven.  Especially not with 4 kids in the car.  Now, I was done by 7am.  Perhaps I could've left Noah in-charge,  armed with cereal and Nick Junior, but I am not so sure I like that.  My dad would be up at that time, so I guess I could have called him to get the kids ready and see if his parents would be willing to watch the girls once they got up so my dad could get to work.  So, homework for this firefighter's wife - figure out your emergency Jeff's not home back up plan.

So, off I will go, with my very sore mummy hand - to make my contingency plans.

Sometimes you just need to take a deep breath...

My firefighter is still adjusting to his schedule.  He has offered to take the "Watchman" position through the night. Simply put, he monitors the radio traffic and answers the phone and door calls through the night, while the other guys sleep upstairs.  This leaves him trying to get back on a sleep schedule on his off days.  Especially after his last shift - it was radio only, no tones.  That makes for a very long night for him.  I am trying to be patient and let him sleep as long as he needs, to nap as much as he needs to.  But that leaves me as a single mommy on his shift days, as well as a good portion of his off days.

Today, I kept the kids quiet while he slept.  Our favorite firefighter joined polite civilization around 9:30am and instantly announced he was going to run down to Engine 30 to grab a light he ordered from one of the guys.  I kid you not, the moment he left, our lovely muppets - who had been so nice and quiet while Daddy slept - erupted in a sea of screams.  Livy was ticked off that Brennan was cleaning the toy room, Brennan was furious that Liv made a mess (even though I tried to tell him that is just what 2 year-olds do), Desiree was mad that Daddy left without taking her, making sure everyone knew that she was dissatisfied and our oldest, Noah, was making his indignation at my request to clean up his desk, VERY well known.  I left.  In my bare feet and fire academy sweats, I went out and stood on the deck (in 28 degree weather).  I counted to 10, counted again and again and again and again...

I know everyone is having to adjust to this new lifestyle, but I feel like I am the only one making the adjustments with the kids.  I feel (knowing full well that perception is not necessarily reality) as though Jeff is making the adjustment to HIS new lifestyle, but not ours.  Please tell me that we will hit our stride and find our routine, please.

2nd shift is done....well in 21 minutes

Jeff is almost done with his 2nd shift at Engine 2.  He had a captain on his engine for yesterday's shift and they seemed to gel quite well.  The radio system has been down since yesterday, so he noticed guys  flying down the poles and was wondering why - turns out the tones did not go off. So, Jeff had radio duty, he had to monitor the radio traffic last night.  He will be a bit tired when he gets home.

I am still working on finding my way.  My dad stopped by after his haircut, when the muppets were in bed.  It was nice to have a grown up conversation.  The kids went to bed without a problem, got up without a problem - I just have to figure out how to sleep while Jeff's at work.  I got 4 kids up, fed, dressed, cleaned up and out the door by 5:45am.  Pretty good if I do say so myself!

The 2nd shift is underway

The Halsey Fire Crew

Jeff's first shift was Sunday - Halloween.  It was a quiet shift - 2 calls, one he could not find the bp for (oops, out of practice on the EMT side of things - so he and the other cub practiced back at the station) and a GSW transport from Sinai Samaritan to Froedert.  Other than that, he had a day of cleaning (did you know he could wash dishes???), popcorn making (for the rest of the crew while they watch TV! <snicker>).  I met his captain when I took the kids down to trick or treat by Daddy.  I really liked him.  The bay is HUGE!  I think I counted 6 firemen poles - which I think is the coolest part of it all!!  I am looking forward to the time when I can get a grand tour.

Hanging with Daddy at Engine 2

This morning was our first day of a school day/combined with Jeff going to work when we have school.  It was pretty painless.  Although, truthfully, it does go smoother on the mornings when he is not home.  I am not sure if it is because I don't have to stop to find what he needs or because I can pop out of bed at 4:30, rather than taking that last snooze or two, or just some combination there in.  He took the girls to the sitter and life was good.  Tonight is when it will be hard.  Having to do all the parent duties at night is a handful.  Ah well.  Tonight I think we might  treat Grandpa to dinner since he has been helping out so much.

So cool, Daddy!